"Just some childhood trauma"

Ok, so from the start, I don't know if this story is helping you, but it kinda makes me feel like I am not so alone in this trauma, yk? Today I will talk about my experience with sex abuse from my older brother.
I will not say his name or age, but we are 7 years apart, so when I was 6-8 y, he was 13-15.
Everyday, we will go to home from school together and maybe eat, watch movies or do homework until my mother came at 4-5 pm(she is a nurse).
I remember like it was yesterday. I was in my room with him, when he told me to undress and be just in my underwear. He put me to sat on my belly and watch a serial or smith like that while he was touching me. I cryed and felt so uncomfortable, and he told me that Iied and that I liked it. Just to remember, I WAS 7 OR 8, I DIDN'T EVEN KNEW HOW TO SWIM.
That happens several times.
He went to highschool in another city, and after that at the college. We never talked about it. And sometime I think that I made all that up because he is so nice and a good person. I don't know how he was capable of doing that to me.
I am really sobbing my eyes out when I am writing this but hope you have a great day. Your account just makes me realize that maybe not everything is so white and dark and that it could be a chance of happiness.

Ps: If you wanna share this story I am ok with it.